I've been "at home, sick" aka on disability pension, since March 2002. Generally, I've been living my "new normal" for a long time and don't often think about "being sick". My illness is as managed as it can be, I know my body's limitations and, more or less, live within them. There are still the odd days that I long to be back at work but as more and more of my old co-workers retire, it happens less and less.
What irks and saddens me most though, is how small my world has become. My immediate family, a sister, a long-distance crafting buddy [weekly skype dates] and my health care professionals. These are the people I see.
I absolutely dread running into anyone that knew me "before I got sick". Ugh. The weight gain, the lack of mobility, my drunken gait [vertigo, not booze], the ravages of my medication that show on my skin and hair.
Urocyon's Jaunts: "IN TODAY'S SOCIETY, CHRONIC ILLNESS IS VIEWED AS A PERSONAL FAILING ›
When I recently read the phrase, “I’m embarrassed to be sick,” it made my stomach clench and my breath catch. ... a reluctance to be seen or even talk to people–especially those that knew me before I became chronically ill.
... ... In our competitive society, chronic infirmity or illness is viewed as a personal failing rather than the random stroke of fate that it is. "
'via Blog this'
Thank goodness for the internet. My connection to the world, news, entertainment. I visit on blogs like I used to go for coffee. I don't have to excuse my looks. Hell, I don't even have to be showered and dressed! Plus, if I'm awake at 3am, my "pals" on the internet are too. Thanks for being there internet.
